Opinions

By: Joe Donnelly

You didn't like The Vagina Monologues? The ICA Monologues are not to everyone's taste either. Attendance at the Community Association meetings appears to be slipping. Maybe less monologue, more meeting is in order.

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Accurate minutes of last October's board meeting of the Silver Threads Association will show that the board, on moral grounds, refused to let the Fringe Festival use the community-owned building at 1311 - 9th Avenue. What's next -- a ban on bagpipes? Klezmer bands? Linedancing?

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After a prolonged struggle with the ACS (Alexandra Centre Society) board, The Alex, with its many thriving programs, has left the building and the community. What has replaced these programs?

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The re-creators of Nellie Breen Park have turned the meaning of "gazebo" inside out. ("Gazebo" is a 600-year old English word of no known etymology, with no connection to the word "gaze.") Traditionally an octagonal, opensided structure where a person, preferably seated, can enjoy the tranquillity of the surrounding greenery, the Nellie Breen Park gazebo is meant to be looked AT, not OUT OF. The glasswork panels are lovely and mighty expressive of community. A glazebo perhaps?

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When the development at the old National Hotel site finally gets restarted, it is to be hoped that whatever commemorative plaque is put in place mentions by name all the illustrious Inglewoodians who were regular patrons of The Nash.

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The community website (icacalgary.com) is a useful source of up to date information on Inglewood -- if you died in early 2008. If you're still alive, not so much. Check out the Ramsay website for an instructive comparison.

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Jack Long, evoking the KISS Principle ("Keep it simple, Stupid" -- a maxim of undetermined origin but likely from the profession of journalism), devised the local slogan: "Keep Inglewood Slightly Sleazy." The tag seems unfortunate, the implication being that Inglewood has seen a whole lot of sleaze in its day. That is not what the old folks say. In spite of the city's past disdain for "East Calgary," Inglewood has always been a nice community to live in, maybe just not as upscale as some other areas.

Perhaps it's time to devise a new acronym for here -- e.g., KID, "Keep Inglewood Different," or KIF, "Keep Inglewood Fun." You do the work, as suggested in the following verse:

KEEP INGLEWOOD....

K.I.S.S. is cousin
To a dozen
Acronyms for here.

K.I.D. and K.I.N.D.
Come to mind
As you know they would.

K.I.L.T. and K.I.L.L.
Don't fill the bill
As slogans for the 'hood.

But K.I.T.H. and K.I.N.
Are surely in
On Inglewood's behalf.

K.I.P., K.I.R., and K.I.F.
Deserve a sniff
If only for a laugh.

K.I.C.K. and K.I.N.K.
Make you think
But hardly fit Bow Bend.

K.I.T. and K.I.N.G.
Have a ring,
Rejected in the end.

A baker's twelve
To slowly delve
Acronyms for here.